The other day I followed a thread on a public weight loss forum about someone who professed to be so concerned about a woman she saw at her local market who was obese and thought she ought to talk to her about it and give her advice about changing. There was a lengthy description of the food in the cart (crap of course), the woman's appearance, greasy skin, poor clothes choices and the denouement - inability to gracefully get into her car, requiring a backwards plop! But the poster was very worried and really just wanted to help.
As a former obese person, I heartily object to this attitude. Two years ago, when I started down my weight loss path, I was so filled with shame and humiliation - we all know that eating too much food and eating crap food is the cause of our weight gain (in 99% of the cases). I vowed that I would not take it upon myself to start judging other people for their weight because I've been on the receiving end of the scorn too many times. It would be like continuing to hate myself in reverse, and I've done enough self-hating to last a lifetime!
All this brought to mind a conversation I had with a friend about a year ago, when I had lost about 100 pounds or more. She had also lost a good amount of weight but unfortunately had started gaining a lot back, for various reasons, I'm sure. She asked me if now I didn't look down my nose at her. Nope. No way. Been there. But I will support every effort and struggle to either 1. Lose weight and gain health 2. Love yourself anyway.